[JCarrill0]

The Secret Lives of Stormtroopers


Are Imperial Stormtroopers really the disposable, brain-dead killers that the media makes them out to be? Contrary to popular belief, very few are. For most, Stormtrooping is just a way to pay the rent and keep food on the table. Because of its potential negative impact on the Empire’s ruthless image, this information has always been a tightly guarded secret.
Until now.
Thanks to some recently obtained photos, we now have indisputable proof that when they’re not out crushing the Rebellion, most Imperial Stormtroopers live their lives just like you and I.
What do they do when they’re not on duty? We now know that they…

1. Go to parties
   
2. Take Hawaiian vacations
   
3. Hang with Buddy Christ
   
4. Run marathons
   
5. Shop for groceries
   
6. Moonlight at Starbucks
   
7. Cut it up on the wheels of steel
   
8. Ride merry-go-rounds
   
9. Chill with fish mongers
   
10. Hang with French maids
    
11. Go to the mall
    
12. Eat noodles
    
13. Get haircuts
    
14. Attend business meetings
    
15. Ride the subway
    
16. Rock out with Kiss
    
17. Smoke weed
    
18. Write advertisements
    
19. Make some extra cash pole dancing
    
20. Get hassled by the man
    
21. Kick around their lawyers
    
22. Check their blood pressure
    
23. Hula hoop
    
24. March in parades
    
25. Ride amusement park rides
    
26. Harass Spongebob and his stupid square pants
    
27. Attend VW car shows
    
28. Check tomatoes for signs of small, penetrable ventilation ducts
    
29. Audition for Reservoir Dogs
    
30. Have breakfast
    
31. Eat in cafeterias
    
32. Patronize weirdos
    
33. Sneak a peak at your junk when you’re drunk
    
34. Catch gnarly waves
    
35. Pwn N00bs
    
36. Listen to Van Halen and wonder, “WWDLRD?”
    
37. Go book shopping
    
38. Hang out with their brother the imperial accountant
    
39. Play with Barbies
    
40. Chill on the porch
    
41. Drink dark beer
    
42. Drain the main vein
    
43. Mow the lawn
    
44. Celebrate the holidays
    
45. Relax by the lake
    
46. Drink Pepsi
    
47. aaaAAA AAA Afternoon Delight!
    
48. Get in some cardio
    
49. Taunt small children
    
50. Go to rock concerts
    
51. Hit the arcade
    
52. Hang with pro wrestlers
    
53. Visit Mexico
    
54. Move major keys right under the DEA’s nose
    
55. Eat ice cream
    
56. Moonlight for Scotland Yard
    
57. Hang with rock stars
    
58. Everybody say, “Breakdance!”
    
59. Dine in Middleboro
    
60. Go bowling
    
61. Sit on fences
    
62. Sit in windows
    
63. Hide in swamps
    
64. Drop Wookies off at the pool
    
65. Sing like the King
    
66. Ride their Segways
    
67. Play football like the ancient Americans
    
68. Get parking tickets
    
69. Stunt double for Evil Knievel
    
70. Bag groceries
    
71. Play “go fish”
    
72. Go swimming
    
73. Babysit
    
74. Have threesomes
    
75. Get milked by Jedis
    
76. Bench press
    
77. Watch TV
    
78. Attend local sporting events
    
79. Hang out with Ronnie McD
    
80. Intentionally Ignore Bob
    
81. Celebrate St. Patty’s Day
    
82. Drift race
    
83. Pimp their rides
    
84. Go broke
    
85. Really go broke
    
86. Take public transportation
    
87. Get drunk and check random cars for droids
    
88. Dress up like Spiderman
    
89. Harass Best Buy employees
    
90. Get crushed by a giant Spiderman
    
91. Hang with the ladies from church
    
92. Relax in the pool
    
93. Fight the Yakuza
    
94. Make new friends
    
95. Taunt the rebellion
    
96. Get tattoos
    
97. Commit to Hello Kitty in a serious way
    
98. Aggrivate Gene Simmons
    
99. Take up amateur photography
    
100. Take long walks on the beach
     

See? Stormtroopers are just like you and me.

[Xortox]

Wow...

[JCarrill0]

lol you like?

[Xortox]

The list is LONG man. But I like Stormtropper activity #17 the most