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Post ID: 348112
#1
Posted Wed 10 Jan, 2018 7:32 PM
–
Last edited by Brask; Mon 15 Jan, 2018 4:45 PM.
=================== Reconstructed from Deleted Data Archive ====================
== Meeting from Negotiations of Alliance later known as United Federation of Planets ==
Attendees: W. Curtis, Negotiator for United Earth - Earth
T’Vol, Negotiator for Vulcan High Command - Vulcan
Keval, Negotiator for Andorian Empire - Andoria
Absent: Gaavrin, Negotiator for Tellar Prime - Tellar
Meeting Purpose:
To decide on the symbol to be used to represent the proposed alliance.
Meeting Minutes:
Earth - proposes a symbol “quickly whipped up by UE Public Relations” (Attachment A).
=Attachment A=
Andoria - suspiciously asks where the idea came from.
Earth - claims to have no idea and at this point moves arm to hide the United Nations patch it displays.
Vulcan - wished to emphasise how illogical it is to be wasting so much time on such a trivial detail.
At this time Tellar arrives and expresses anger at the quality of signage to point out restroom facilities in the diplomatic complex. No apology for lateness is given.
Andoria - Accuses the Tellarites of not taking these meetings seriously.
An argument ensues between the two parties, mostly concerning each others questionable lineage on the maternal family side. (Request previous section stricken from record in interest of giving future generations impression of peaceful collaboration between founding states).
Andoria - suggests an amalgamation of all the obvious facial features of each race.
All parties agree to try this out in principle and drawing board is found.
Vulcan - begins by suggesting that the basic face should be human as, for whatever reason, the universe has decided that most races are essentially humans with extra parts stuck on.
Tellar - modifies the nose to resemble that of a Tellarite.
Andoria - adds Andorian antennae.
Earth - draws on long pointed ears.
Vulcan - expresses dismay at humans continued obsession with Vulcan ears, but continues by questioning what the skin colour should be.
Andoria - starts coloring top of symbol blue.
Tellar - Adds a beard and starts colouring bottom side with brown.
Tellar & Andoria collide at middle.
A further argument ensues involved throwing of art supplies as well as insults. (Again, request this is stricken from record in interest of maintaining persona of cooperation).
Lunch is declared to be ready so all parties agree action for Earth to take current sketch to be finished by artists.
Actions:
1) Earth to get sketch (Attachment B) turned into professional symbol
=Attachment B=
=========================== Meeting Adjourned ==============================
========================= Related note found in archives =======================
To: Starfleet Art Department;
From: W. Curtis;
Title: RE: New Symbol for Alliance
Message:
I know! I know! What a f**king abomination! I guess we just go with our original design and hope no-one notices.
I recommend we destroy all information related to this project. If this federation agreement lasts we don’t want stuff like this coming back out of the woodwork.
Regards,
W. Curtis
Ambassador’s Office
=============================== End of Note ===============================
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Post ID: 348464
#2
Posted Mon 15 Jan, 2018 4:42 PM
=================== Reconstructed from corrupted data Archive ====================
======= Transcript of intercepted messages between the High Archon’s office =========
================= and Head of Warp Starship design, Planet Groo’lean ===============
Vek: Professor Prost, it’s vital that we speak immediately. A matter of great importance has come up regarding the design of our new Warp capable ships.
Prost: High Archon Vek, sir, it’s an honor to speak to you directly, but I don’t know what you mean? I’ve spent the best years of my life working on these designs and they are perfect.
Vek: We’ve been give a dossier on other warp capable species in our galaxy by those Federation people who contacted us after our first successful warp tests. I’ve been pouring over it and discovered a grave oversight in our design that means we must halt production immediately.
Prost: But, what? How? My team and I have covered everything! We can’t possibly have missed something so dire. Is it related to the environment control system? I know we never quite got the gravity exactly right on prototypes but we are sure the modifications have addressed that.
Vek: No, the environment should be perfectly comfortable for our cosmonauts on their journeys.
Prost: Is in the sublight or warp engines? I know they aren’t as advanced as those we saw on the Federation vessel but it’s the best we can do with their unwillingness to share their knowledge.
Vek: No, the engines should perform well enough for initial missions out into the galaxy.
Prost: Then please, sir, explain to me how my team and I could have dedicated over 3 centuries of combined time on this only to have a non-technical bureaucrat come to us at the last second claiming that we’ve made a massive oversight on designs he probably doesn’t even understand?!
Vek: Ok Prost, if you’re such a genius, you tell us what colour our ships should be!
======================= Remaining transcript still corrupted ======================